Lost In The Darkness
by Piper Emerald
Summary: "It's terrible when you can't trust the people who are closest to you." Jack spoke in a monotone that sickened Hatter. She sunk to her needs, wishing that this nightmare would end. "Why are you here? Why did you really save Alice from being banished with me?" Oneshot.


Hatter found herself lying in the middle of a pitch-black darkness. She pulled herself to her feet, and waited for her eyes to adjust. She felt the dagger in her hand right hand, and her left one to put it away, but miscalculated the distance between her arm and the end of the blade. She let out a small cry when the blade cut her skin, and pulled it away quickly. Her wrist stung, but she could tell that the wound wasn't deep.

"Are you alright?" Jack cut though the silence faster, and shaper, than Hatter's dagger had cut her hand.

"What do you think?" Hatter hissed, glad that the darkness enabled her from having to look him in the eye. Jack was silent, and Hatter figured that he didn't know quite what to say.

"I'm sorry", his voice was soft as he said this.

"Your sorry?" Hatter laughed, a laugh that would make anyone who didn't know what she had just gone through think her a lunatic. "What exactly are you _sorry_ about? Are you sorry about how you betrayed me and side with a woman that you met only a few hours before? Or are you sorry that you specifically ignored me when I told you to stay out of this? Oh, and what about the fact that you ruined what took years for me to obtain and doomed me to a life in the middle nowhere?!"

Although she couldn't see him, Hatter was sure that Jack had taken a few steps backward, away from her.

"You could have at least told me who she was. How was I supposed to side with you if I didn't know the reason why you hated her?"

"You were supposed to mind your own business", Hatter muttered.

"You know I can't do that, it go's against everything that I stand for." She could almost see the grin that was plastered on his face.

Her thoughts went back to the moment when she had lost it all, she wished more than anything that she could turn back the clock, just a few minutes, so that she could know what she had done wrong. Had she done anything wrong?  
Once Jack and Alice had the execution list, there wasn't anything that she could do. But how had they gotten the list? Realization dawned on her, and she found herself voicing what was so hard for her to believe. "Morris betrayed me, didn't he?"

"It's terrible when you can't trust the people who are closest to you." Jack spoke in a monotone that sickened Hatter. She sunk to her needs, wishing that this nightmare would end. She could feel the heat, but still couldn't see the light.

"Why are you here? Why did you really save Alice from being banished with me?" Hatter hated the fact that she needed to know if Jack really loved Alice. She hated the fact that she was hoping that he didn't, hoping that he at least some of the feeling that he used to have for her still remained.

"Sacrifice. She has a daughter, a family, I have nothing. It's only right for me to be the one doomed to spend the rest of eternity stranded here." Hatter had never seen of Jack as alone in the world, but, the more she thought about it, the more it made sense.

"You wanted to be the hero, didn't you? You thought it would fill some void inside of you. Did you even really care about her?" Jack was silent for a few seconds, and Hatter wondered if he was going to answer her.

"Fine", he said with a sigh. "I wanted to be remembered as a selfless hero, who put always put others ahead of himself. I'm not in love with Alice, but I did want to help her. I wanted to die for something, even if that something wasn't real. Even if, right now, Alice probably thinks that I was nothing more than a dream. I thought that I would feel good about myself after this, but I don't. I just feel like I'm living a lie. So there, that's my life's story, you happy now?"

"I'm never happy", Hatter said coldly, but then asked: "Did you really want to die for something, I mean, you actually wanted to die?"

"Maybe death hurts worse than life." Hatter's eyes were beginning to adjust to the darkness, she could see made out Jack's silhouette but he seemed like a nothing more than a shadow.

"Well at least you got half of what you wanted. I lost everything."

"Did you even have anything to begin with?" Hatter wished that Jack could see the death glare she was giving him. Of all of the people in the word to be stranded with for all eternity, it just had to be him! "And, if you had won, you still wouldn't have gotten what you wanted."

Hatter wanted to say something back, to tell him that he was wrong, but her voice wouldn't work. "What is it you think I want?" She finally asked.

"To feel real, to actually feel like you're a whole person, not just a mirror of Alice. You thought that killing her would free you, stop me if I'm wrong." Hatter knew how Jack must have felt a few minutes ago, when she was telling him what was wrong with him. Now he was paying her back, but what hurt was the fact that she knew both of them were right about each other. Why?

It's true they had once been friends, but that was years ago. That was back when life was simple, back when Hatter thought that she could change her destiny. So why could she still read his emotions without even having to look at him? How could he guess all of the secrets that she didn't even admit to herself in a matter of minutes?

"That's why you really hate Alice, and me." Hatter waited for Jack to say more, but he was silent. She thought back on what he had just said, and couldn't help but wonder if she really hated him. Right now, although it pained her to say so, she pitied him more than she pitied herself.

"You're right. That is why I hate Alice, but it's not why I hate you", she paused for a moment, but Jack said nothing. "I hate you because, even thought we haven't seen each other in years, you still won't leave me alone." Jack chuckled, and Hatter smiled inwardly.

"I think you might need to rethink your definition of hate."

"Do you really think that I'm just a mirror of Alice?" Hatter loathed how vulnerable she sounded.

"Someone told me once that most mirrors are mere errors. Do you know what that means?" Jack didn't wait for Hatter to answer. "Well I didn't when it was told to me, but now I think I do. I think that it means nothing can be an exact reflection of something else. Everyone is different, although they might not appear so at first."

"I wanted a strait answer, not a philosophy lesson", Hatter remarked dryly.

"What I"m trying to say is that I think you're as much your own invention as Alice is." The lighting around them was getting brighter, and Hatter was afraid that Jack could see the small smile forming on her lips. "I really am sorry", although it was still dark, Hatter could see Jack's eyes as they stared into hers.

"I know", her voice came out as a whisper. "I'm sorry, too."

That was the first time that Hatter had let herself apologize to anyone for pain she knew she had caused. She felt a relief that she hadn't expected to feel. Maybe spending the rest of her life in the land beneath Wonderland, with Jack, wasn't that bad after all.

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**I quoted a lot of things in this story, and I'll be glad if anyones recognizes any of them.**

**Thanks for reading!**


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